Monday, March 27, 2006
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Interesting Groder Definition
Brandon Bilinski still has the best groder definition. The guy who wrote this one below is kind of a tool and ass clown himself, but does make some good points...
12/4/2003: Groders from http://www.angelfire.com/theforce/flakeisajedi/
Groders piss me off to no end. What exactly is a groder you ask? The term groder is the combination of the two words 'gross' and 'odor' to form 'groder.' I constantly have to deal with these idiots on the roads, in the workplace, and at my places of leisure. What exactly is a groder in layman's terms? Well there are several warning signs under several categories of personal preference that you may be a groder.
Your Car: This isn't just what kind of car you drive but also the manner in which you drive. Do you drive a Buttstang (buttstang: Webster defines buttstang as a Ford Mustang produced after 1980.)? Do you think your buttstang is hot shit, even though it's not? Chances are, you're a groder. Do you street race often? Think it's cool? Ever consider the consequences?... didn't think so. Do you like to go 20 mph over the speed limit at all times? Do you believe in the saying, "If you can't find 'em, grind 'em?" Yeah, if you said yes to any of these questions, then more likely than not, YOU are a groder and a jackass.
Your Clothing: Wear clothing that barely stays on your body? Have a chain on your wallet? Are you 'all about' some Fubu, Tommy Hilfiger, etc? If your answer to any of this was a yes, then you, my friend, are a groder and an idiot. Try looking up a company that makes respectable clothes, like Harbor Bay or Allexander Lloyd, or hell even Puritan.
Music: Do you listen to Marylin Manson (I assume this is how this idiot spells his name), Kid Rock, any rap 'artist' (I use the term loosely here), other than to make fun of their shitty music, ICP, punk, NoFX (yeah they're their own category of shit far worse than other punk)? Think they're cool?
Want to dress, act, smell just like them? Guess what, pal? Not only do you suck insane amounts of ass, but you're also a groder. If you think you fit into the category of 'groder' then you probably do. Even if you don't think you're a groder there's 68% chance that in all actuality you are indeed a groder. Do us all a favor and kill yourself. The world would be a much cleaner, happier place if all groders would just commit suicide, or at least for me anyway.
12/4/2003: Groders from http://www.angelfire.com/theforce/flakeisajedi/
Groders piss me off to no end. What exactly is a groder you ask? The term groder is the combination of the two words 'gross' and 'odor' to form 'groder.' I constantly have to deal with these idiots on the roads, in the workplace, and at my places of leisure. What exactly is a groder in layman's terms? Well there are several warning signs under several categories of personal preference that you may be a groder.
Your Car: This isn't just what kind of car you drive but also the manner in which you drive. Do you drive a Buttstang (buttstang: Webster defines buttstang as a Ford Mustang produced after 1980.)? Do you think your buttstang is hot shit, even though it's not? Chances are, you're a groder. Do you street race often? Think it's cool? Ever consider the consequences?... didn't think so. Do you like to go 20 mph over the speed limit at all times? Do you believe in the saying, "If you can't find 'em, grind 'em?" Yeah, if you said yes to any of these questions, then more likely than not, YOU are a groder and a jackass.
Your Clothing: Wear clothing that barely stays on your body? Have a chain on your wallet? Are you 'all about' some Fubu, Tommy Hilfiger, etc? If your answer to any of this was a yes, then you, my friend, are a groder and an idiot. Try looking up a company that makes respectable clothes, like Harbor Bay or Allexander Lloyd, or hell even Puritan.
Music: Do you listen to Marylin Manson (I assume this is how this idiot spells his name), Kid Rock, any rap 'artist' (I use the term loosely here), other than to make fun of their shitty music, ICP, punk, NoFX (yeah they're their own category of shit far worse than other punk)? Think they're cool?
Want to dress, act, smell just like them? Guess what, pal? Not only do you suck insane amounts of ass, but you're also a groder. If you think you fit into the category of 'groder' then you probably do. Even if you don't think you're a groder there's 68% chance that in all actuality you are indeed a groder. Do us all a favor and kill yourself. The world would be a much cleaner, happier place if all groders would just commit suicide, or at least for me anyway.
Friday, March 17, 2006
Man severs own penis, throws it at officers
March 17, 2006
BY ERIC HERMAN Staff Reporter
Before cops threw the book at him, Jakub Fik threw something unusual at them -- his penis.
Fik, 33, cut off his own penis during a Northwest Side rampage Wednesday morning. When confronted by police, Fik hurled several knives and his severed organ at the officers, police said. Officers stunned him with a Taser and took him into custody.
"We took him out without any serious injury, with the exception of his own," said Chicago Police Sgt. Edward Dolan of the 16th District.
Doctors at Northwestern Memorial Hospital reattached Fik's penis Wednesday, sources said. He was listed in good condition Thursday, according to hospital spokesman Andrew Buchanan, who declined to comment further.
BY ERIC HERMAN Staff Reporter
Before cops threw the book at him, Jakub Fik threw something unusual at them -- his penis.
Fik, 33, cut off his own penis during a Northwest Side rampage Wednesday morning. When confronted by police, Fik hurled several knives and his severed organ at the officers, police said. Officers stunned him with a Taser and took him into custody.
"We took him out without any serious injury, with the exception of his own," said Chicago Police Sgt. Edward Dolan of the 16th District.
Doctors at Northwestern Memorial Hospital reattached Fik's penis Wednesday, sources said. He was listed in good condition Thursday, according to hospital spokesman Andrew Buchanan, who declined to comment further.
Monday, March 13, 2006
It is Not a Biometric ID
Normally we keep serious political and social commentary out of Groderz. But this just bugs me.
Everyone has a signature bar on the back of their credit card. You're supposed to sign it as soon as you receive the card, to authorize it for use as payment.
Many retailers have begun using this signature as a way of checking that you are the owner of the card. They compare the signature on the card to the the receipt you just signed (or pretend to) in order to verify that you are both the card signer and the receipt signer.
In this age of identity theft, some consumers don't feel that is enough. They feel picture ID is necessary, not just a signature comparison. So instead of signing their card, they write "CHECK ID" on the signature bar. The idea is that your driver's license has both your signature and your picture on it, which is even better.
But a lot of retailers don't accept this. Every day someone wants to tell me another story about the "stupid" checkout clerk at Wherever's Department Store that wouldn't accept their card because it wasn't signed. They beam from their high horse about their superior intelligence, and how the world is going to hell because stupid clerks aren't reasonable enough to understand the increased security of a picture ID and to look there for the signature.
Well, here's the deal: If your card isn't signed, it isn't authorized to be used as payment. That's why it says "authorized signature." An unsigned card is an unauthorized card. The primary intent of signing a card is not to put a biometric identifier on it (though it is that as well), the intent of signing a card is to legally state that, "yes, I authorize and accept responsibility for this card, along with a simlarly signed reciept, to pay for things against my good name." So if I were a stupid retail clerk, I wouldn't accept your unsigned card, either. Get over yourself.
Sorry for the whiny rant.
Everyone has a signature bar on the back of their credit card. You're supposed to sign it as soon as you receive the card, to authorize it for use as payment.
Many retailers have begun using this signature as a way of checking that you are the owner of the card. They compare the signature on the card to the the receipt you just signed (or pretend to) in order to verify that you are both the card signer and the receipt signer.
In this age of identity theft, some consumers don't feel that is enough. They feel picture ID is necessary, not just a signature comparison. So instead of signing their card, they write "CHECK ID" on the signature bar. The idea is that your driver's license has both your signature and your picture on it, which is even better.
But a lot of retailers don't accept this. Every day someone wants to tell me another story about the "stupid" checkout clerk at Wherever's Department Store that wouldn't accept their card because it wasn't signed. They beam from their high horse about their superior intelligence, and how the world is going to hell because stupid clerks aren't reasonable enough to understand the increased security of a picture ID and to look there for the signature.
Well, here's the deal: If your card isn't signed, it isn't authorized to be used as payment. That's why it says "authorized signature." An unsigned card is an unauthorized card. The primary intent of signing a card is not to put a biometric identifier on it (though it is that as well), the intent of signing a card is to legally state that, "yes, I authorize and accept responsibility for this card, along with a simlarly signed reciept, to pay for things against my good name." So if I were a stupid retail clerk, I wouldn't accept your unsigned card, either. Get over yourself.
Sorry for the whiny rant.
Friday, March 03, 2006
World of Offline Gaming
This video is kind of long but very funny. It basically shows what would happen if the hardcore MMORPG geeks acted the way they do online in real life. Ninja looting, Leeroy Jenkins and other madcap antics are included. Thanks to Deadpan-Entertainment.com.
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